Me: Mum, can I use the tuna in the fridge?
Dad: What are you going to use it for?
Me: (sarcastically) I'm going to smear it on my genitals.
Dad: Mind the cat, that's the kind of pussy you don't want
(*Me, texting my Dad*)
Me: So can I keep the cat inside the house?
Dad: I'll have to ask the Magic Conch.
User Ouilleau responds to a recent post we made. That too Ouilleau, that too.
(My mom and my grandma talking during dinner.)
Grandma: (talking about our dog) When I went for a drive with Jake in the back seat he just laid on the floor and cried.
Grandma: Yeah, he just laid down and started crying.
Mom: That's what I do every time I'm in a car with you driving.
Steven Spielberg Criticized for the "Triceratops He Just ...
"Matt, Do Your Girl Voice!"
Attack on Titan Meets Pokémon and I'm Never Sleeping Again
Obama Flashed a Smile After Being Offered a Hit of Legal ...
17 Ways You Can Make a Running Otter Seem Even More Epic!
Sometimes You Don't Really Know Your Parents
Literally, This Couldn't Apply to Everyone
Britney Spears Without Autotune is a Disaster
Max-Arthur is a Cat That Loves to Relax With a Nice Bath
Pick Your Site Name
Tell me more