Mom: *sigh* I just want to be a lady of leisure.
Me: ... You want to be a prostitute?
Mom: No! I want to be a wealthy bitch!
(My mom and I discussing school projects)
Me: Essay projects are one of the few school projects that I don't mind doing, since they're not a right answer-wrong answer sort of thing.
Mom: I actually like more solid foundations, like in math: 2 + 2 will always be 2... Wait a second...
(Me: *Skyping cute boy*)
Mom: *Barges into room* Who are you talking to?
Me: Travis, mum.
Mom: You better not be showing him your privates!
Mother: Don't quote what I say on facebook. Seriously, if you quote what I say you will sleep on the roof for three weeks. And you can quote me on that.
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