Me: *putting on chapstick*
Dad: Is that stuff good for chapped lips? I wonder if that'd work for my asshole... maybe I should get some.
(My mom was talking to her self at the store)
Me: Mom who are you talking too?
Mom: Myself, I have to talk louder than the voices in my head.
(Talking about my mum's partner.)
Sister: But you do love each other, I know that.
Mum: It's a fine line between love and hate and the cutlery drawer.
Sister: You're never too old to-
Mum: To stab someone? No.
Clearly somebody is very familiar with the art.
Super Genius Man Tapes Mentos to His Body Then Jumps Into ...
A Random Text for Somebody Named Ash Turns Into an Opportunity ...
This is the Worst Elevator Ride These Guys Will Ever Have
This Lady Gives the Ultimate How-To Guide To Dickpics
Best of Tinder Week 2/22-2/27
Meet the McDonalds Employee Who Hates Fun
The Weightlifter's Struggle
These Guinea Pigs are Better Cosplayers Than You
These Terrifying Maps Show What Major Cities Would Look Like ...
Thank Your Lucky Stars You Don't Have a Schedule Like This ...
Pick Your Site Name
Tell me more