Meaningless Bets Are a Sacred Rite

Favorite
Dad: If you get that girl pregnant you have to name the kid Fruitloop. Me: Why? Dad: I lost a bet.
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Sounds Like an Excellent Round of Hockey

Favorite
My mother texts me: Hey... Dad wants a ticket to the game in green bay for Christmas... I believe it's a football game and I think it's the Packers against another team... Possibly the Yankees.
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What Else is Skype Good For?

Favorite
(Me: *Skyping cute boy*) Mom: *Barges into room* Who are you talking to? Me: Travis, mum. Mom: You better not be showing him your privates!
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The Old Carcinogen Diet

Favorite
Dad: What have I always said about smoking? Me: I don't know, it's bad, don't do it? Dad: No, it keeps you thin.
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