Me: Dad, I can't remember what RNA is!
Dad: Remember, RNA is sort of like an aggressive date.
Me: ... Huh?
Dad: It helps unzip your genes! Ha!
(*Me, texting my Dad*)
Me: So can I keep the cat inside the house?
Dad: I'll have to ask the Magic Conch.
(After watching an ad against drunk driving)
Dad: Why drink and drive when you can smoke and fly!
Mom: Yeah, that's a good lesson to teach your sixteen year old daughter.
Dad: It's true! Don't make me throw my coffee mug at you.
(Dad hits rumble strips while driving.)
Me: What are those for?
dad: That's how blind people drive. It's called braille driving.
Mom: Don't leave your windows cracked. Someone might put a snake in your car.
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