Genetic engineering has, at long last, made it possible to imagine a world without rhinoplasty.
Someone once asked me if beards were a recessive trait or a dominant trait. I simply laughed in his face.
Me doing my bio-chem homework: Mom, do you know how to make DNA strands and put them through protein synthesis?
Mom: Well, I had sex with your dad and now we have you. That was the worst lesson of genetics I ever had to live through...
Me: Oh Jesus...
(Grandma scolding me for having girlfriend's name tattooed on my arm.)
Grandma: You just wait until your grandfather sees it.
(Grandpa walks in the room and looks at tattoo.)
Grandpa: Oh... Wow, that looks way better then mine!
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