Sis: Let's get smoothies. Mom: I don't like smoothies. Me: You don't like smoothies? Mom: Or milkshakes. Me: Holy cow how can you not like milkshakes? Mom: I don't like that kind of texture, all creamy and gooey and sticky in my mouth. ::long pause, in which sister and I stare open-mouthed:: Mom: You asked! You wanted to know! I have no regrets!
me and dad at kitchen table eating dinner dad:you know, our family should be a sitcom me: because you have a son who was suspended for practical jokes, a gay son whose boyfriend lives with us, and .... dad: no. then any guy your sister dated would be an actor and if he got her pregnant i could sue him for millions me:oh