A writer in Boise, Idaho takes some editorial license.
Concerts are fun until you're too old and crotchety to tolerate things like getting someone else's urine on your shirt.
You've always been sad about it, but now you can quantify your creys!
Should've let the crowd get closer to the stage. That's what you get for distancing yourself.
A backstage pass AND a stun gun, a potato sack, and a getaway van.
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