If you think your friend might be about to say something funny, don't take a drink of soda. It will go down the wrong way and you will end up puking and then coughing for ten minutes. It will be unpleasant, to say the least. #LFMF

Don't try to make sense of Drongo. It will never happen. #LFMF

If you are a guy in high school and decide to go back to school without shaving or having on hair cut after the entire summer, you will be reffered to as "John Lennon", "Ashton Kutcher", and "Jesus", not only that, but your family will think you have multiple personalities when you tell them that as of today "I am now four different people." #LFMF

Never trust a cup of tea near a book. Even if you don't spill it, certain teas have absorbent strings tha will happily wick your tea onto the book nearby, which is quite absorbent and not yours. Tea makes books warpy and well, tea colored! #LFMF

No matter how much your computer needs it, NEVER use that "System Restore" feature (I forget what it's really called). Not only will you be logged out of everything, but the restoration program will have uninstalled Google Chrome, and you are unable to reinstall it properly. #LFMF

Good idea: Taking the stairs on your deck to get to the ground level fire pit that is by the opposite side of the deck. Ok idea: After a few beers climbing over the edge of the deck to hop down right by the fire pit. Bad idea: Trying to climb over that part of the deck again, many more beers later, getting your foot stuck on the ledge when you are halfway over, falling 6 feet to the concrete ground and bruising the crap out of your knee, hip, and arm. #LFMF

Just becuase that bottle of coke you knocked over in the fridge hasn't gotten the foam to the top yet, dosen't mean it won't bubble over when you open it. #LFMF