drugs

news poop drugs what Probably bad News police - 8405400064
Via: Philly
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It only gets worse from there. From Philly:

A security guard told him to wait on a nearby bench, and Higgs apparently thought it was the perfect chance for a smoke break.

But he wasn't packing tobacco.

When the officer Higgs so desperately wanted to see came out, he smelled the marijuana immediately and took Higgs into custody.

And then the show began.

Higgs disrobed, while still babbling, and relieved his bowels on the floor of his holding cell, Chitwood said. Then, as if struck by artistic inspiration, Higgs grabbed his own feces and "wiped it all over the walls," he said.
funny-news-fail-ashes-coke-teens
Via: The Smoking Gun
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From the Smoking Gun:

A trio of teenage burglars who stole cash, jewelry, electronics, and prescription drugs from a Missouri residence also thought they got away with a stash of c0caine they found in a wooden box, only to later discover that the powder was actually the cremated remains of the homeowner’s father, police report.

Upon determining that they were not, in fact, in possession of c0caine, the teens discarded the remains out the window of their getaway car. One of the burglars actually tasted the powder and realized it was not a controlled substance. 
drugs florida Probably bad News news - 8421306624
Via: Tampa Bay Times
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From the Tampa Bay Times:

When he was arrested at a Kmart in Hudson on Monday, the Pasco County Sheriff's Office said, Balmer, 50, was wearing a black shirt. Across the chest it said "Who needs drugs?"

Below that it said: "No, seriously, I have drugs."

And, the sheriff said, he had drugs.