crime

news-us-fugitive-sends-lima-police-selfie
Via: Buzzfeed
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The original photos received with disapproval from Mr. Pugh:


Just cause you're on the run, doesn't mean you stop caring about the looks--good and bad.


"This photo was sent to us by Mr Pugh himself," Lima Police Department wrote in a post.

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"Man, they just did me wrong," Mr Pugh disclosed while on an Ohio radio station about why he sent the selfie in the first place.

"They put a picture out that made me look like I was a Thundercat... or James Brown on the run. I can't do that.


Fans of this madness even banded together to pitch their efforts together, and start up a Facebook page for Pugh.

news-fail-condom-robbery-explosion
Via: ABC News
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The poor fella needed protection from the protection he so adamantly, and somehow recklessly tried to acquire.

ABC News reports the 29-year-old man and a couple his buddies planned to steal the condoms by blowing the rubbers vending machine to smithereens.

Amidst the explosion the three fools took shelter in a car nearby, but the victim failed to close his door, and took a fatal shot to the noggin from a flying piece of metal.

news-miami-crime-woman-arrested-drugs-wal-mart-chicken-wine
Via: CBS Miami
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Brought to you fresh and fried out of Lecanto, Florida, The Citrus County Sheriff's Office arrested a woman on shoplifting and drug paraphernalia charges. She was apprehended amidst a shopping cart fueled joyride out of hell.

The woman's been identified as Josseleen Elida Lopez, 25. Lopez was held after scarfing down $32.36 worth of food and wine. She told the authorities she's homeless.

If you're going to hit rock bottom, at least eat some chicken, and wash it down with some wine right? In all seriousness we wish Lopez the best on her road to recovery. Deputies disclosed to the press that they found two empty syringes after arresting Lopez, which she claims she used to inject crystal meth.

news-guy-playing-pokemon-go-walks-himself-into-police-custody
Via: Fox 2
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Sometimes we lose ourselves amidst the pursuit to catch 'em all...Let's just hope that this fool over in Milford, Michigan wasn't actually trying to catch a Parasect before he was apprehended by police authorities. 

Chief Thomas Lindberg said the man (William Wilcox) just made it easy, by showing up. Wilcox, a repeat offender with a warrant out for his arrest, ended up right in front of the men that'd go on to take him into custody.

"It was a misdemeanor warrant for a failure to appear on a breaking and entering charge," Lindberg said. "They approached him. Took him in custody without incident and he admitted he was trying to catch the character at the flagpole."

Via: Channel 4 News
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Sit down Neil McCabe.

"It's just part of life, I think," proposes McCabe at one point, when he's confronted with the unavoidable fact that more than 130 people have already died from gun violence in the U.S. this year.

This is where Snow channels his inner GoT Jon Snow, and goes off in the most effective, yet vaguely stoic way possible.

"No, it's part of death, Mr. McCabe," responds Snow. "That's death. That's dead people, people who have died as a result of guns."

Stand up. Now leave Neil McCabe.

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