That's one way to ensure that no one uses that urinal.

OK it's not just me, kids kind of suck right? I'm not just getting old?

Because it's not a real vacation unless you've cheated on your wife and impregnated one of the locals.

And then mid-text, Dad remembered that Katelyn doesn't even play baseball.

Drafting the perfect text message is a learned art form. Just remember, the more you write, the more likely you are to literally set the other person's phone on fire.