Infinite time!
An addiction that creates stress, speeds the aging process, and eats at your bank account? Yep, sounds like parenting. Or crack. But mostly parenting.
This just warms the cockles of my heart. And arouses it at a very reasonable rate.
It'd still be a fail even if s/he hadn't missed the "r" in "shirts." YES SMELLING OTHER PEOPLE'S SHIRTS IS CREEPY.