Don't Chase 'Em

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Don't Chase 'Em
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Received a text from an unknown number.

As someone who just found out he got rejected, the sender took it like a champ. Still, if he's going to be so insistent on asking "whos this?" he shouldn't respond "WHOA dog don't TRIP c'mon man" when he's asked the same question.

If at First You Don't Succeed, Try Doing the Exact Opposite

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If at First You Don't Succeed, Try Doing the Exact Opposite
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"Oh goodness, the way he put me down like that completely lowered my self-esteem and made me 100% more likely to go out with him!" swoon

Operation Hot Guy

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Operation Hot Guy
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Careful, though! The more tricks you publish on the 'net, the more hot guys that will know about it!

Haha, just kidding. There are no hot guys on the internet.

Texting Signals

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Texting Signals
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Everything seems to go according to plan, until you ask her out and she responds "Noo" with two o's.

Winky Face, You Little Strumpet

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Winky Face, You Little Strumpet
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If winky faces are the trollops of smiley face land, then (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻) are the oppressed cubicle workers with short tempers.