Prepare for the Most Awkward Day Ever

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Prepare for the Most Awkward Day Ever
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THAT'S WHY YOU SAY THESE THINGS IN PERSON

NOT OVER YOUR EXPENSIVE TOY

ARE YOU MAD

Cutting the Red Wire

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Cutting the Red Wire
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In this analogy, the exploding bomb is the girl replying "Ewww, gross, you're a creepy schmuck and I award you two out of ten hottie points" and ignoring me. My bomb-ravaged body represents my self-esteem.

Don't Chase 'Em

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Don't Chase 'Em
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Received a text from an unknown number.

As someone who just found out he got rejected, the sender took it like a champ. Still, if he's going to be so insistent on asking "whos this?" he shouldn't respond "WHOA dog don't TRIP c'mon man" when he's asked the same question.