But Your Beard Is So Soft and Feminine!

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But Your Beard Is So Soft and Feminine!
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From the submitter:

My number used to belong to a girl who must have put out quite easily... Random texts from horny dudes looking for booty calls are common.

I Stopped Wearing Weaves and Lost SIX Pounds Instantly!

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I Stopped Wearing Weaves and Lost SIX Pounds Instantly!
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Ask YOUR dietitian about the wear-less-of-your-stankass-getup plan today!

D'oh!

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D'oh!
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As they make phones smaller and smaller, this is my secret fear, especially with touchscreens. Soon all my texts will say "hey do you feel like cnx hogi wejlhnlh vhcio?,)?"

The Future Is Coming

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The Future Is Coming
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Sure is extra future today. Maybe we just need a change from all the nostalgia stuff we've been doing lately.