Always Assume That Strangers Are Child Molesters

Favorite
carousel,molester,mom,parent,Trolling Wrong Numbers,wrong number,Wrong Numbers From Dumb/Creepy Strangers
- -

Whenever anyone says "it's me" via text, you can safely assume that he or she is over the age of 50 and has been texting for fewer than one year.

There Were EXPLOSIONS

Favorite
accident,carousel,police,stories,Trolling Wrong Numbers,wrong number
- -

I'll bet I know where he got that story from...

autocowrecks - actual wreck

Wait for the Shyamalan Twist Ending

Favorite
carousel,dates,family,m night shyamalan,sister,Trolling Wrong Numbers,wrong number
- -

From the submitter:

I got a random text from a number and I decided to play with the person. Note that my texts are green. Funny part is, they're from Puerto Rico and I'm from Central NJ!

But What Do You Think, Now That I Have Your Attention?

Favorite
carousel,divorce,marriage,mom,parenting,Wrong Contact,wrong number
- -

Drat, why does "Son" have to be so close to "Marriage Counselor" on my contacts list?

You're One Asshole I Don't Trust

Favorite
ahole,ass,carousel,trust,wrong number,Wrong Numbers From Dumb/Creepy Strangers
- -

The ass needs to be fresh before you can lick it.

Download the new Cheezburger app for a chance to win a PS4! in Cheezburger 's Hangs on LockerDome